London's Calling, England doesn't care
by Antonia Stark-Bondevik
Summary: Write letters to London and England! London wants to talk to the fan base, and England doesn't. Prove him wrong, thanks! T for BTT popping up randomly, and London and England have sailor mouths.
1. Meet London, Igi, and England

England pulled the computer over.

"London, what is the meaning of this?"

London looked over at him and pulled the computer back. She had green eyes and dark hair, and glasses. She looked to be about 16 and dressed in a gray t-shirt with some Japanese symbols on it, and a pair of jeans. They were sitting together on the couch.

"Aw, England, stop being so stiff! I want to talk to your fans a bit!"

England rolled his eyes.

"My fans are annoying. They pair me up with that idiot America, right IGI?"

On the other side of the room, a girl who looked like a darker-haired version of Estonia looked up from her laptop. She was curled up on an armchair, wearing a red band shirt and jeans.

"Yeah, they do."

"Come on, let's see what they say!" London said cheerily.

"London?" Igi said.

"Yes?"

"You do remember, this was my idea."

"Yes, but I'm trying to convince big brother England," she said, giving England a shove. He rolled his eyes.

"All right, then we need to introduce ourselves." Igi pulled the computer over.

"I'm The-goddamn-Iron-Girl, but everyone calls me Igi," Igi said. "IG obviously stand for Iron Girl, and the extra I..." she shrugged. "It's just for cadence. Ask me questions, too!"

London spoke up. "I'm England's awesome little sister, London! I'm hosting the summer Olympics this year, so I need a little break. I'll answer questions, thanks. But one thing..." Her aura went dark and Russia while Igi hid behind the chair. "If you hurt my big brother, I'll hunt you down and kill you, got it?"

"Heh heh...the world's most overprotective little sister, everyone!" Igi said nervously. England looked at London.

"How many times have I told you not to do that? It scares people. You even scared Russia last time."

London rolled her eyes. "Fine, said the guy who let me personally burn D.C in the war of 1812 for revenge."

England sweatdropped. Igi looked at her computer.

"Holy crap, is that the time? I've gotta go soon, guys. Remember what I told you?"

"Why on earth do they even let you hang out with them?" London said, sitting forwards.

"Because, my dearest London-Chan. I am all things to all men. Plus," Igi said, picking up her jacket and cell phone on the way out the door, "I have the blood of two-thirds of their little trio. And they're not that bad."

"They drop in all the time and make a mess," England muttered.

"That's because this is my house, England-San, not yours. Now, I have people to see..." Igi left.

London pulled the computer closer to her.

"Right. So England-sama, Igi-chan, and I will be answering questions and dares. We await your questions!" London said, as she typed the words into the computer. "Post. There, now we wait."

"I can't believe you blackmailed me into this..."

"Do you want the world to know about your pajamas? No thank you. I think you'll like it." London said.

**A/N: All right! Another Letter Fic! Send letters through PM unless you're an Anon, then you can by review. I'll accept both. Updates when I get letters. **

**Eagerly awaiting your letters,**

**England, London, and Igi **

**Igi: Oh, right! The BTT is partial to dropping in at my place. So they might be around more than ****once! ;)**


	2. British West Florida IggyxUS

Igi sat down on the couch, pulling out her computer. She checked her email and smiled.

"Hey guys, we have a letter!" London poked her head around the corner. She was covered in flour.

"Already?"

"Yeah, already. Cmon. Were you trying to cook again?"

"BBC films cooking shows in my city, I can cook!"

"Yeah, whatever you say, London...Get England."

London turned and yelled up the stairs. "Hey England!"

England responded, "What? Are they around again?"

"No, we got a letter!"

England came downstairs. "Really? What does it say?"

Igi looked at her laptop. "Ok, this is from ******British West Florida- IggyxUS****.**"

******Dear Aunti and Mommy,**

******Hello! It's British West Florida! Auntie London, if you don't know me, I'm**

******England's daughter! Along with America being my daddy. Daddy said it ALL**

******happened when they were drunk, whatever that means... Anyway, My question is,**

******Can i come to your house to escape Florida? She's being a meanie pie and is**

******telling me Pensacola's her city and not my capital! Love,**

******British West Florida - Seven year old Micronation**

London looked over at England.

"I have a niece? Never mind. Soo much explaining to do. Just...so much. Um, hello BWF. Great to meet you." she shot England the evil eye.

England scratched his head. "Um, hello, BWF dear. You can come here anytime, unless France, Prussia, and Spain are hanging around. They're a bad influence. And-" he turned his evil eye to Igi- "They had better not hear about this, or else."

"I'll kick them out if I have to," Igi said helpfully. "And I'm posting this on the Internet, of course they can see it, idiot."

"Um, good. Apart from the Internet bit."

"Now England, I'd like you to explain to me how this is even possible..." London said, dragging England off into the other room. Igi snickered. Poor England had a sister as tenacious as Belarus.

"VICTORIA!" England yelled from the other room. Igi snickered again. Poor, poor England.

She began typing up what had conspired, adding more about herself.

******Hi, It's me, Igi! I just thought I'd tell you more about myself? If that's ok. I'm younger than London is in human years, but I'm not in Middle school or Elementary. Don't worry about the innuendos- bring it on, I have the brain of a 22 year-old. O_o And I am part British! Which explained a great deal when I found out. What parts BTT? Whoever figures it out gets a virtual cookie. Awesome. Igi-chan out, peace!**

_A/N: Thanks to British West Florida- IggyxUS! I feel so loved! _


	3. Crazyrabbit2

Igi was frantically shoving outdoors items into a bag when London walked in holding the laptop.

"Hey, Igi? We've got another one."

"Another one? I feel so loved," Igi said absently, shoving some items into her ever-inflating bag.

"This one is for me, do you mind?" London said, holding out the computer. Igi rolled her eyes, then paused and took the computer.

"This is from ** 2.**"

**To London.**

Arite? I haven't seen you, or most of our other siblings in agess, you've  
probebly been too busy with the olympics, an' I've been propa busy with all  
that capital of culture festivals and that like.

Whatever, I'll see all youse at the olympics (just praying to god the rain  
holds of.)

From Liverpool 

London visibly brightened. "Hey, Liverpool! I haven't seen you in ages, either. Yeah, the Olympics have been kind of a big freaking deal. And you get all the manic Beatles nuts, like Igi-san and her friend, Michele." Igi looked up.

"I'm not a nut! I just want to visit!"

"Anyway, you know, we're all hoping the weather holds, but rainfall has been down in my city, so I'm hoping." London held up her crossed fingers. "See you at the Olympics!"

London turned to Igi. "Why are you packing, anyway?"

"I have camp, remember? I told you last week."

"When I was reading and listening to music?"

"Yes."

"I never listen while I'm reading!"

"Well, I told you, I'm going away to camp this weekend. You and England-sama are coming, but I'll be en communicado for two weeks." She sighed. "How will I survive without my FanFiction?" Igi added dramatically.

"Chill. We'll be there with you, right? You can write about our craziness, and maybe you'll have some good stories for the fans when we get back?"

"Yeah, you're probably right. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger."

"Anyway, I should probably go pack too, right?"

"Oh, yes, definitely."

"That explains where big brother England is..." London said to herself on the way out the door. Igi snickered.

"I didn't tell them that their least favorite nations ever are probably tagging along. The hilarious stories will be plentiful."

"When are we leaving?" London called, not hearing Igi's evil plan.

"Saturday!" Igi called back ,returning to her packing.


	4. Crazyrabbit2 Chicago

London sat on the couch, fanning herself with a magazine and watching Doctor Who.

"What do you even do on that computer, Igi-chan? And why does it have to be so hot in California?"

Igi looked up from her computer.

"First off, I could live in Texas or New York, it's actually a normat temperature around here," Igi side pevishly. "As to what I do on my laptop, it's not much. I write, I wait for your letters." she clicked twice. "Speaking of which, you've got another one."

"Really? From who?"

"Ah... ** 2 ** writes again. Not Liverpool this time, sorry, London-"

"Aw."

"This time, one of America's."

"Let's hear it."

**Hello, London, Arthur, and Igi-chan!  
I'm one of Alfred's cities-Chicago-and I'll never forgive you for beating me  
to hosting the Olympics this year. That being said, it's looking like it'll be  
a great one and I can't wait to meet up with you guys for the opening  
ceremonies!  
Stella Jones **

"Hey Stella, thanks for giving me a shout!" Igi said cheerfully. "First time, too..." she added, muttering.

"Didn't we watch that movie a while ago in your city? The Untouchables?" London said, looking over at Igi, who nodded.

"Yeah. England thought the violence would freak me out. He's so...strange sometimes."

"Good movie. Anyway, it's pretty much first come, first serve for the Olympics, Stella," London said, shrugging. "Thanks for being a good sport, though. I can't wait for this. It seems like a lot of countries are bringing their cities along this year. See you then!"

"Oh, and," Igi added, smirking slightly, "Everybody wish me luck with my...camp fun." she grinned evilly. London made a face worthy of a Russia situation.

"What fun? Just you, me, and England going with you to Mammoth, right?"

Igi smirked. "...right. Anyway, see you all next time!"

_A/N: Legit going to Mammoth. And Yosemite. So pumped! Will be out for about two weeks starting this Saturday. Just warning you. _


	5. British West Florida IggyxUS Starry

Igi snick up and out of the basement and over to the couch, where London was lying down. London rolled over as Igi shook her.

"What, is the house on fire?" she said, pausing the TV.

"No, we do have another letter, though," Igi said, holding up her laptop. England poked his head in.

"Did you say letter?"

"Yeah. Where have you been all day, anyway?" Igi said, typing furiously.

"Packing for your stupid camping trip." Igi sniggered.

"Anyway, we have another letter from ******British West Florida- IggyxUS****.**" England paled.

"Ah, don't worry my Anglo friend, it's from her friend."

******Dear Every personification there,**

******Hi, I'm Starry, Britty's first demon friend-, please don't ask me how we met.**

******Anyway, What's being personifications like? Britty say's it's fun but.. she's**

******7. And she's just a micronation. So i decided too ask you all. Well, that's**

******i********t. Goodbye,**

******Starry.**

Igi groaned. "Hi Starry, and welcome to the rant session."

London ignored her. "Well, I'm not a personification of a nation, but I could be a micronation if I tried- not that I want to," she added. "It's hard. We have to feel all the pain that our country (or in my case, city) feels, so...basically, anything that can go wrong, will go wrong, and we take all the damage. In other words, it sucks."

"I second that," England said, nodding. "It's not that fun. We have to make decisions, sometimes decisions to hurt people."

"And," London added, "There's the paperwork, the bloody paperwork. You don't want to see this one-" she pointed to England- "When he hasn't slept for four days."

Igi looked at London. "Oh, right, and you haven't been missing sleep to work on Olympics proposals."

London flushed. "You're right, I haven't!"

A shout came from the basement.

"Come on, Igi! The awesome me has almost beaten you on Street fighter x Tekken!" Igi put her computer down and walked over to the stairs.

"There is no way in HOLY HELL you'll beat me in Street fighter! Bring it on!"

"What is taking you so long, Igi Cherie?" another voice called. Igi looked over at London and England, who were giving her the evil eye, as in why-didn't-you-tell-us-they-were-here evil eye.

"Um, London and England needed me. We had a letter."

"Oh? What did it say?"

"It asked what being a personification is like."

"Hard!"

"Not exactly a barrel of laughs, amigo."

"Ja."

"Be right down, guys!" Igi called, before turning back to her computer. "There's your answer, Starry. Unfortunately, I can't answer, but I have to cut them off, before they start ranting about the Blitz, economy, Sewage in the river, Congestion..." Igi rolled her eyes. "Be lucky you've got a micronation there, Starry, because when she grows up...it isn't a barrel of monkeys." Igi finished typing and shut down her computer. "You may now return to your movies, London, and...whatever you were doing, England." she ran downstairs, calling out, "Has the supposed awesome one thrown down the Streetfighter x Tekken gauntlet? I hope not, I'll open up a big can of whoop ass!"

England rolled his eyes. "And you wonder why I never go in the basement, London."

"Now I know. Do they live down there?"

"Practically." England shrugged and walked away, London went back to her movie.


	6. Springirth Dale

Igi, London, England, and the BTT crowed through the door into Igi's house.

"That story reading was a success, chica!"

"Igi, that story you did about Londres and Angleterre was magnifique!"

"Aw, thanks France. It was just a little piece of fluffiness, that's all."

"Victory Scones!" London yelled, running off into the kitchen. England smirked and followed, leaving Igi and the BTT. France turned around to face Igi.

"So, Mademoiselle Igi, anything you'd like to admit?"

Igi blushed. "What the hell, France?"

France and Spain shoved Prussia and Igi into the closet. A muffled shout of "Mein gott!" was heard from inside. (Since Igi has a habit of swearing in German, it's up to you who said that). France smirked and snickered. Spain put a hand over his mouth. There was a thump from inside, and the door burst open. Igi stormed out, but she was blushed bright red.

"What a bunch of Schiesse I put up with from you two!" Igi said, but she was blushing. France snickered. London and England picked this moment to re-enter with scones.

"...I'm not hungry, Angleterre."

"Just had tomates, Inglaterra."

"I'll take one, England," Igi said. "I love Scones." The BTT gave her unusual looks.

"Down into the basement, guys, we're going to play Streetfigher 'til the sun comes up." Prussia grinned.

"The awesome me can finally topple you from your throne as the queen of Streetfigher!"

"In your dreams." They went downstairs. Igi took a scone from England, and pulled out her phone.

"You guys have a letter."

"Can I see?" London said, looking over Igi's shoulder.

"This is from **Springirth Dale**." Wènhòu, Miss London, and Sir England,

**Wènhòu, Miss London, and Sir England,******

**Miss London, I wish you yùnqì in the Olympics, I am sure it will be a****  
****complete success.******

**Sir England, I do hope you are doing well.******

**With the...people visiting you and Miss London and all...I think it is almost****  
****impossible.******

**Just drink your tea like usual.******

**Sincerely,******

**Hong Kong****  
**

"Hey, Hong Kong!" London said brightly. "I'm loving all the Olympics wishes. Makes my day."

"And as to the tourists," England said, rolling his eyes, "We put up with them because it's good for our economies. Even if most of them are annoying Americans." Igi gave him the evil eye.

"Don't mean you, Igi, you're an Anglophile, those are welcome anytime in our world," London added.

"Thank you," Igi said.

"By the way...what was that business earlier? I heard the door slam after we were inside, then there was a thump, and yelling."

Igi blushed. "Ah, it was just those three- well, more accurately, France and Spain- being immature, as usual. Shoved me in the closet."

"What- oh. Are you sure you don't have a crush on-" Igi clapped her hand over London's mouth.

"That's enough talking, London-Chan." London smirked.

"You will never hear the end of this, Igi."

Igi blushed. "It's not true! Not awesome, London!" she stopped responding to London's attempts to talk to her on the subject anymore.

"Anyway...we're going away tomorrow for a bit. Getting out of town, you know? They needed a little vacation, so I blackmailed- uh, convinced, them to come with. We'll be en communicado for a week total, and busy for the week after that. Just warning you, bye!" Igi cut off the chapter short before London could try and force an admission out of Igi.

_A/N: Ooooh. My character totally does not have a crush on Prussia. ;) Sidestory FTW! _


	7. Rhode Island

_**A/N: Sorry I was gone for so long! Gah! **_

London, England, Igi, and the BTT walked into the house. Igi flopped down on the couch. "Ohhh god, now I remember why I'm an indoor person..."she pulled out her laptop. "Sweet, sweet, FanFiction, how we have been parted..."

Prussia snickered. "You can't even go a full day without writing or reading about us, can you, mädchen?"

"Nope," Igi declared proudly. "And that's why I'm checking my email for new chapters, then going on some more."

"Oui, well, I will be in ze basement trying to beat your record on Black Ops."

Igi looked up. "You arse! Don't even try it! Five minutes, me, you, all out death match, got it?" France snickered.

Igi glanced at her laptop screen. "Got a letter. From..." she squinted. "**Springirth Dale** again. Apparently a lot of our followers have more than a few friends."

**D-Dear ,**

**H-hello. I wonder if this is formal enough...Is it? Oh! Was that rude to ask? I'm sorry! Please don't hurt me sir! I-I'm just a little state! I shouldn't even be a state-just a city would be ok with me! Really! So, please don't hurt me! You were really scary-I mean strong in the revolutionary war! Oh dear, New York told me not to bring that up-but I did. All I wanted to ask w-was...d-do you really make tea with milk and not water-Y-You don't have to answer if you don't want to! In fact you can just burn this letter now! I'm SORRRRYYYYYY!**

**S-so sorry, Rhode Island**

This earned generally confused responses from everyone.

London was the first to talk. "Um, hey, Rhode Island. Seriously, we don't get mad about the Revolutionary War. I did, but not mad at you. Honestly. Don't be scared, ok? We have a little one too, the Isle of Wight. We're not mean or anything."

"And our tea? Honestly, it depends on what sort of taste we want at the moment. I don't know about you, London."

"Yes, that's pretty much how I roll, too."

"Kesesesese~ England's got a mini-me!"

"And I'm damn proud of it."

Igi broke them up. "Come on guys, cool it. We just got back from camping, I'm tired..." she raised her voice. "But not too tired to go downstairs right now and show France who's the queen if he's even trying to beat my highscore on Black Ops!" France smirked.

"Challenge accepted." He took off down the stairs, and Igi lunged after him, yelling. "Oh hell no! You did not just go there!" She leaped down the steps, yelling insults too foul for a teen rating. Spain looked at England.

"Inglaterra, did you teach her those words?" England shook his head. Spain shifted his gaze to Prussia, who also rapidly denied it. Then they all looked at London, who held up her hands in surrender. Prussia shrugged and started down the stairs. "Kesesesese~ My awesomeness will attempt to beat you, Igi!"

"You're so full of schieße! Bring it on, gottverdammt!" Prussia's face cracked into a grin, and he disappeared into the basement. Spain took a bite out of a tomato he had been holding. "This sounds too interesting to pass up on watching. Adios, amigos." He followed Prussia down the stairs, leaving London and England, who shrugged and went into the kitchen.


	8. Florida

Igi walked in the door of her house, slurping on a cup of lemonade and holding her cell phone.  
"Hey England, London!"she called. London looked down from the top of the stairs.  
"What now? Are the Bad Touchers staying over again?"  
Igi shook her head. "No, but you do have a letter, do you want to read it or not?" London slid down the banister.  
"I'm listening."  
"Where's England?" Igi asked, taking a sip of her lemonade.  
England was followed by a cloud of black smoke out of the kitchen. Igi stared.  
"I don't even want to know what that was supposed to be." She said.  
"Never mind that, we have another letter from-"London grabbed the phone and looked. "**Springirth Dale** again."

**Dear Igi, London, and England, Hello! I'm Florida! The sunshine state, home of the BEST oranges. Not California. Not. Her. Anyway, I'm running out of patience for Brit, so can you give me some advice? I need some because her and that demon are free loading off of me. Bye, Florida *Box of oranges are being sent to you guys :D **  
London started peeling an orange. "Thanks for the oranges, Florida! Ways of getting rid of BWF? Hm...I don't spend a lot of time with the other cities/counties, because we like to stick to home, except for Parliament." She shrugged. "But I do know that sending America after her will (most likely) work wonders. He is in charge, after all. I hope this helps! And if not, send her over here."  
"Actually, Florida, you caught us at a good time," Igi said. "Spain isn't here, for once. And thanks for the oranges. I love Florida Oranges."  
"Yes, you heard right, the BTT are actually not in Igi's house or property for once!"England said. Igi rolled her eyes.  
"How many times have I told you, they're not that bad. They're nice to me."  
"Whatever," London said, attempting to stop a fight in progress. "Thanks for writing, and thanks for the oranges, Florida."  
London then proceeded to lock Igi in the basement and England in the attic. Then she sat down on the couch. "Finally, I can watch Lie to Me without England complaining that it's ruining my innocence," she said to no one in particular.


	9. Minnesota

Igi shifted her eyes to the corner of her computer as a notification popped up. She clicked on it and scanned the letter.  
"Hmm, it's a letter from **hetalialover**."

**Dear London, Igi, and England,**

**Hi! It's me, Minnesota! I'm another child of America/Alfred/"the hero". London, I wish you luck on the Olympics, even though Dad is forcing me to root for USA. Anyways, just wanted to say hi!**

**-Minnesota**  
Igi looked up. "Hey, Minnesota. Sorry, London and England...currently not in. And they're kind of pissy lately, anyway. You know, with Romney insulting their Olympics and all. I will pass on your wishes, kay? And...I'm American, no matter how much Lon and Igs dislike it, so...USA! USA!" She snickered. "I could never get away with that if England wasn't meeting with his boss and London wasn't busy fighting the big fight in Parliament. Seriously, they're more than a bit pissed off."  
Prussia's voice came from the bathroom. "London's also on her lady time!"  
Igi twisted around. "What the hell, Prussia! How do you even-"  
"There's wrappers in the trash! Kesesesese~"  
Igi rolled her eyes. "You're strange." She turned back to her computer. "Oh, right! Almost forgot! I'm writing up some fuckery that went down while we were camping, for your entertainment pleasure, so expect **Our Camping Adventures** to be posted here SOON! Oh, and spoiler..." she lowered her voice- "I cause fuckery with the BTT and I love it! So stay tuned!"  
"Mein gott, Igi, 'stay tuned'? How cheesy is that?"  
"Shut up and go back to your TV whatever the fuck. Anyway, see you next time!"

_**A/N: Gah, so short!**_


	10. Massachusetts

Igi was asleep on her laptop when London poked her. Igi jumped and said, "OHGODNOITOTALLYHATEPRUSAUS."

London gave her a strange look. "Check you email, please oh almighty authoress?"

Igi facepalmed and scrolled through her inbox.

"Here's one!"

**Dear England,**

Rhode Island just got your response. And passed the F*ck out. What the F*ck.  
He's gonna F*cking drown. Whatever. What the F*ck did you say to him anyway?  
I'm just writing because I didn't want to leave ya' hangin'. Don't worry about  
the whole faintin' thing, though. He does this sh*t all the time. Nobody  
f*cking knows so don't ask. He's so F*cking paranoid. I don't even F*cking  
know. Rhode Island told me to tell you to apologize for my vulgarity, I don't  
even know f*cking why. He says I swear a lot around strangers. But I F*cking  
know you. Kinda.  
Whatever,  
Massachusetts 

"Um...Hi, Massachusetts," London said nervously. "We didn't, like, say anything mean to him, if that's what you're implying."

"And I'm right in saying that the BTT can back her up," Igi said. "Which reminds me, they wanted me to do an ask fic for them, too. I'd enjoy that."

"Anyway, Back to the subject," London said pointedly. "You're right, RI is kind of paranoid, but don't blame him. I think I'm bigger than him, and I'm a city! Imagine what that does to the self esteem! And you do swear a lot, but I don't mind. England and I are ex-pirates, so..." she shrugged. "We literally cuss like sailors."

Igi smiled slash smirked. "Yeah, I love having all this cussing around. Oh, and depending on whether or not those three can coerce me into it, I might do a 'Ask the BTT.' I like this Ask Fic thing. And j'adore the BTT. They're hilarious."

London rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, whatever."  
"Seriously, pretty much anyone who can make me laugh and's not a total dick is ok in my book."

"Then why are you friends with them?"

Igi facepalmed. "I told you, they're not dicks. They just like to muck about. I like to muck about too."

"Fine, whatever floats your boat, Igi." Igi groaned and downsized something on her computer.


	11. California

Igi was typing away furiously when her phone rang. She checked it, clicked a few things on her computer, then called in London and England.

"Hey, my Brits!"

London slid down the banister. "What?"

"I find it awesome how you respond when I call you one of my Brits."

"I only go with it because you're an Anglophile..."

Igi smirked. "Where's your brother?"

"Oh. He's, um..." London coughed into her fist. "He's in his room."

Igi furrowed her eyebrows for a second. "He's- oh. Right. Well, tell hime to wear protection in case Russia shows up again."

"Yes, he's dressed up like Jason from Friday the Thirteenth."

"I doubt that would scare Russia...but you've got a letter."

**Dear English people,**

Like, what the H E double hockey sticks. Massachusetts just totally randomly  
gave me this laptop and told me to watch it for him. I knew it was Rhodes  
cause of his totally lame flag sticker in the corner, don't get me wrong Rhody  
is so super mega ultra adorb. Obvi I had to tots go through his e-mail,  
though. I totally found you guys. Omg this is awesome, I'm TOTS tellin  
everyone and I'm like really jellin on how many connections little itty bitty  
Rhody made, I mean WTF, I'm mother trucking California. Why did he not tell me  
this soooooonnnneerrrr gosh, lol jk i luv u GAIS, by the way, yeah. Just to  
let you know watch out for Illinoissssss, he's totally a creepy pedo, do you  
have any wierdos in your fam?

Like awesome CAL-I-FORNIA 

"...just me, or does that remind you of Poland?" Igi said quietly.

"Yeah. Um, Hi California! Yeah, since more than a few of you have visited...I know about Illinois. I had to pull out my pirate sword last time. Yeah, congratulations to RI from us, too...that kid needs some more confidence."

Igi nodded assent.

"Weirdos? Penzance still kind of has this strange Pirate fetish...Dover is a lot , and I mean A LOT, like France. No surprise, considering he practically lives next door to that creeper. Blackpool is a bit creepy- sort of deserted creepy. And Oxford is a reclusive sort of creepy." London tugged at her memory. "That's all I can recount, right now."

Igi was still in a state of shock. "...I live in California..."

"Anyway, since our authoress is catatonic, I'll have to say it- thanks, California, for writing in!"

London took Igi's laptop. "I'm going to find what you've been writing so intensely these past few days~"

"Gah! Nein, no, Non, Nyet!" Igi snatched the laptop back from London. "You'll never see it, ever."

"Have your 'friends' pressured you into making them an ask? Is that your project?"

"Nah, not yet. ...and don't put the air quotes around friends!"


	12. Florida 2

Igi sighed, shutting her laptop.

"Ugh. I have this new story, but it's going slowly. I might post it, but I have no idea..."

London rolled over. "What's the problem?"

"It's basically a collection of songfics, but they all point towards a similar end. And the end...I...Well, that's an integral part of the story. Spoilers."

"Mmn, fine. But do we have new emails?"

Igi pulled out her cell phone. "Ja, we do."

**DUDE! I screamed 'NO NON NIEN NYET!' when my friend tried to tackle me three **

**weeks ago! (She's a Russia cosplayer and i'm multiple people like Germany, **

**France, Italy, and Fem!Russia...) **

**End of AN! **

**Dear Uncle Iggy, Igi, and Cuz London, **

**Sup! Florida again! If you got a message from Hammy saying i threatened to tie **

**her to a chair and leave her in my ghetto... She's lying, m'kay? No need to **

**tell dad.. or anybody else... And i sooo did not tell her on the phone and **

**come to her house with the chair and rope... Hehe... Ha.. *Laughs nervously* **

**And the police soo come to the ghettos when you call them *Mumbles something **

**sounding like 'The next day'* **

**Anyway, PEACE, **

**Florida **

**Miama Flora Del Rosa Jones**

Igi smiled. "Haha, really? I just said no in every language that immediately sprang to mind."

London continued. "Hi, Florida. Um...haven't heard anything on the subject. And America's staying in some hotel deep in my city right now, he's kind of occupied. Like England."

"Right..." Igi said distantly.

"Still avoiding those three?"

"Maybe."

There was a distinct banging on the door.

"Igi, mon charm you know you'd love to do an askfic for us!"

"Shut up, France!" Igi yelled back.

"Por favor, amiga?"

"...only if Prussia says please...and tells me I'm awesome."

"Fine. Bitte, Igi? We love you, and you're very awesome."

Igi squealed. "I need that as a confidence booster. Ok, guys, I'll make you an askfic. And i hid the spare key inside the garden gnome."

"Danke!"

"Gracias!"

"Merci!"

Igi put her head in her hands. "Oh god, what have I done...I'm going to get so many perverted emails..."

"Chin up. You like them."

"J'adore," Igi said confidently, picking up her laptop. "And now I have to go write their intro, since they pressured me into it."

"Good luck with that."

Igi marched off into the foyer. "All right, boys! To the magical basement of magic!"


End file.
